January 2011
39 posts
God Is A Spurs Fan...
‘Tottenham’s new midfield signing Steven Piennar has revealed that he prayed before making his decision to reject Chelsea in favour of a £3m move to north London. “I prayed and followed my heart,” said the South African.’
“I’m gonna be Oprah rich. Y’all can kiss my ass”
– Zack and Miri make a porno (via jamhull)
3 tags
“…let the women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto...”
– 1 Corinthians 14:34-35
Reading's Mosque-goers
For the past couple of years, local Islamic groups have funded the construction of a mosque in the centre of Reading. Unlike a lot of old-fashioned people, I really don’t mind. We’ve always had a large muslim community in the town and this is just somewhere for them to go and pray.
What annoys me, however, is something I’ve just been told. Apparently, they have asked the council...
An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to...
Professor: You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Professor: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Professor: My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Professor: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From.. God.
Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.
Professor: So who created evil?
(Student didn’t answer)
Professor: Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Professor: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor: Yes.
Student: No, sir, there isn’t.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pon-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light… But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it’s called Darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor: If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student: That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
----------------------------------------------------
That student was Albert Einstein.
Brilliant.
Beautifully done.
----------------------------------------------------
wow, this was really albert einstein? had no idea he if believed in anything at all. when stories become about real people don't they hit so much harder?
----------------------------------------------------
This is bullshit. Firstly, Einstein died 56 years ago - how can the original writer of the post be sure that this is exactly how the conversation went? Especially as it happened in his youth.
Secondly, how can you believe that this is what Einstein said, just because somebody said he did? That's exactly how religion continues to exist - theists can easily make up stories such as this and portray them as the truth without evidence and people will believe it.
Thirdly, Einstein was agnostic. He's quoted as saying, "You may call me an agnostic... I do not share the crusading spirit of the professional atheist whose fervor is mostly due to a painful act of liberation from the fetters of religious indoctrination received in youth. I prefer an attitude of humility corresponding to the weakness of our intellectual understanding of nature and of our own being." He never stated that he was a believer in the existence of God.
Therefore, no - they don't hit much harder if these stories are about real people. But that's exactly why they are created, to make you think they are more genuine.
2 tags
6 tags
[Funny, But Serious] Christian Response To The...
For anyone who hasn’t seen the video I posted yesterday, it’s here.
The Christian Post, an online news site for Christians (and I mean ‘for’ Christians), have watched the video and offered a critical analysis of why the very valid atheist views are bullshit. They even got someone called Dr. Normal (lol) Geisler, an apparently well-educated theist, to comment....
4 tags
knitting-a-ranchhouse-deactivat asked: wahoo thanks! Parisian chef much appreciated. x
whereisyourgodnow asked: fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
Two churches located across the street from each...
whereisyourgodnow:
…Do the Presbyterians think Rocks are animals?
I never understood if this was real, but I laugh every time, none the less.
It’s not. Every photo has been taken in the exact same position, therefore it must have been one of those websites where you can create your own church sign.
sarollie asked: Hey, I saw your question on the friendly atheist. A part of it I really respected:
"I just think that if you want people to respect you as an atheist, you need to respect them as a believer, including understanding something that seems as absurd as being offended by a cartoon drawing."
Agreed! I just wanted you to know what a relief it was to see that...
"I just think that if you want people to respect you as an atheist, you need to respect them as a believer, including understanding something that seems as absurd as being offended by a cartoon drawing."
Agreed! I just wanted you to know what a relief it was to see that...
5 tags
Another Disaster, Another Praise for God
I was quite relieved that throughout the constant stream of news about the horrible flooding going on in Australia, no one has been reported as thanking God for saving them, or asking where he was. The people who have been rescued have the tremendous efforts of the emergency services to thank. My thoughts are with the families who’ve lost loved ones.
My thoughts are also with the ones who...
“Ever feel like you’ve been cheated? Following what they believe?...”
– Burn The Evidence, Billy Talent
In a Facebook message with a Christian, where I’m debating the existence of God, he asked me how we could possibly have become what we are from a single cell and how the wind, dirt, oxygen and water could have been created without God.
I wrote possible the longest thing I’ve ever written in my life. I’m truly exhausted! But I think I’ve set a pretty good argument for him...
3 tags
Starting The Day With A Spontaneous Religious...
You know how on Facebook you can like bands/artists and they occasionally have their Twitter account linked to it, so people then comment on it?
Well, I have The Fray on there and this morning, I woke up to see this Tweet on Facebook:
The “Um” meaning “Um…this is gonna get nasty.” Or “Um…who gives a shit?”
It made me chuckle that someone had...
3 tags
Don't tell me it's a peaceful religion
Men and women have been banned from shaking hands in a district of Somalia controlled by the Islamist group al-Shabab.
Under the ban imposed in the southern town of Jowhar, men and women who are not related are also barred from walking together or chatting in public.
It is the first time such social restrictions have been introduced.
The al-Shabab administration said those who disobeyed the...
Now, to lighten the mood...
The Sickipedia Top 10 jokes of today are brilliant. Best top 10 I’ve seen in a while. Here’s a few of them (the more suitable ones, anyway):
BBC NEWS: French Chef commits suicide after critics attack. After further investigation, it turns out he simply lost the huile d’olive.
...
“Thats the best revenge of all: happiness. Nothing drives people crazier than...”
– Chuck Palahniuk (via gravityandstuff)
2 tags
Things That Aren't Actually In The Bible
http://www.cracked.com/article_18757_5-things-you-wont-believe-arent-in-bible_p2.html
This is hella interesting.
Apparently the things that are wrong are:
Satan doesn’t rule Hell. He’s a prisoner
He didn’t have horns, red skin and goat legs.
Hell is not a fire-filled world. There’s only one mention of fire in the Bible. Matthew 13:42: “And shall cast them into a...
I applied for this yesterday...
I don’t know why I looked at it, as it was located in Manchester/Liverpool, but I noticed the paragraph which said:
“I also need someone local in the Reading/Aldershot area for 1 day.
The jobs would suit an emerging camera person or videographer who has an interest in UK sporting talent. As this is mainly a dev project rather than high end corporate, I can only pay £65 a day +...
“if you don’t know what you want, you end up with a lot you dont”
– chuck palahniuk (via kacilautnerismine)
6 tags
Arizona Cardinals Wide Receiver, Larry Fitzgerald:
“Tough loss to end the season. But I have a lot to be thankful for. Things don’t always turn out how you want them to, but there is always light at the end of every tunnel. God is Good! Faith Focus Finish”
What’s God got to do with it? I mean, they lost (dammit), severely, and finished bottom of their division. They weren’t going to qualify for the play-offs even if...
3 tags
Prison Reforms in 2011?
I hope so. This is a photo from HMP Ford, in West Sussex, where prisoners rioted and set fire to numerous buildings over the weekend. The incident is said to have “involved alcohol”. Whatever that means (and however they got hold of that…).
Something I’ve been hoping for a while now is that there will be a drastic overhaul in the way prisons are run. You read any tabloid...
Lydabuff: “Ah I see what you mean. You can cure those girls, they love the drama. A decent man wouldn’t be exciting. Sadly its true. Nice guys finish last cause women just love having a whine about ‘what the dickhead did this time’”
In that case, I’d rather be the nice guy that finished last, rather than the cunt that got the girl.
Lydabuff: “Don’t you think that’s the problem? ‘dont accept anything less than you deserve’ shouldn’t we be teaching girls Disney is wrong, movies are wrong. Men forget your anniversary, birthday and sometimes get annoyed at you. Women need to accept men are real and have faults. Man up and accept your prince isn’t coming. Find someone you like nd learn to love them for who they are”
...
4 tags
Why Do Sunni & Shi'ite Muslims Hate Each Other?
“The Islam religion was founded by Mohammed in the seventh century. In 622, he founded the first Islamic state, a theocracy in Medina, a city in western Saudi Arabia located north of Mecca. There are two branches of the religion he founded.
The Sunni branch believes that the first four caliphs—Mohammed’s successors—rightfully took his place as the leaders of Muslims....
!!!
“I hate men! Grrrrrrrrr! Why can’t I find a decent man?! Argh!!!! Men are shit!!! BLAH BLAH BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH”
Seriously, ladies, if this is you…….SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. If you find that you’re constantly getting used and abused by every man you date, maybe you’re the problem. Maybe you should go out and find a guy who’s interesting, makes you...